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Home Opinion Ideas

All Alone – What You Realise, Learn

Dr. Shahid Amin Trali by Dr. Shahid Amin Trali
June 24, 2026
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The intention behind writing this article is not to glorify living alone, but to share some experiences accumulated over many years and to offer a few lessons to young people who may, at some stage of life, find themselves away from their families. Certain experiences can be enriching if circumstances permit, but they should never be pursued at the cost of personal safety, well-being, or family responsibilities. If there is any risk—physical, emotional, financial, or otherwise—one should not deliberately choose isolation. Life, health, and safety are far more important than any lesson that can be learned from living alone.
There are phases in life when circumstances compel us to live alone. For some, it may be due to studies, employment, professional commitments, or other responsibilities that take them away from home. While loneliness is often viewed negatively, living alone can become one of life’s greatest teachers. It reveals strengths we never knew we possessed, teaches valuable life skills, and helps us appreciate the blessings we often take for granted.
Recently, I found myself living alone in Gwalior while my family was away. What initially seemed like a routine adjustment soon turned into a journey of learning, self-discovery, and gratitude.
When we live with our families, many daily responsibilities are shared among family members. We often do not realize how much effort goes into maintaining a home. Living alone changes that perception completely.
The first lesson I learned was simple housekeeping. Dusting the room, arranging things properly, and keeping the surroundings clean became my responsibility. It taught me that cleanliness does not happen automatically; it requires discipline and effort.
Soon, I began learning other skills. I learned how to iron clothes properly, wash utensils after meals, and prepare tea whenever I needed it. These may appear to be ordinary tasks, but performing them independently gives a sense of achievement and confidence. Every small accomplishment reminds us that we are capable of much more than we often believe.
I also discovered that if required, I could cook food myself. Even if the meal was simple, the satisfaction of preparing something with one’s own hands is immense. It develops self-reliance and reduces dependency on others.
Living alone is not everyone’s cup of tea. It demands emotional strength, courage, and discipline. When family members are around, there is always someone to talk to, share experiences with, or seek help from. Alone, you become your own motivator, problem-solver, and companion. You learn to manage difficult moments without immediate support.
This independence gradually develops confidence. You begin to trust yourself more. You realize that many challenges that once seemed difficult can be handled calmly and effectively.
Living alone also teaches responsibility. Before leaving the house, one has to ensure that everything is secure. Doors must be locked properly, electrical appliances checked, and belongings safeguarded. Such habits cultivate awareness, accountability, and maturity.
Another important lesson was time management. Since I had to go outside for meals, I became more conscious of how I planned my day. Every activity required scheduling. This increased my appreciation for the value of time and the importance of organization.

“Living alone is not everyone’s cup of tea. It demands emotional strength, courage, and discipline. When family members are around, there is always someone to talk to, share experiences with, or seek help from. Alone, you become your own motivator, problem-solver, and companion. You learn to manage difficult moments without immediate support.”

Living independently also provided practical lessons in financial management and negotiation. Something as simple as arranging meals taught me about pricing strategies and market behavior. For example, purchasing meals on a daily basis could cost around Rs. 90 per meal. However, committing to a monthly arrangement reduced the cost to approximately Rs. 60. Further discussions and negotiations could improve the deal even more. Such experiences teach us that markets operate on relationships, volume, commitment, and negotiation rather than fixed assumptions.These are lessons that cannot always be learned from books. Real-life experiences often become the best classroom.
Living alone also offers flexibility. During this period, I found it easier to participate in professional events and activities outside my city and even in other states. Such opportunities contribute to personal growth, networking, and learning.
Had my little children been at home, frequent travel would have required additional planning and consideration. This temporary freedom allowed me to engage more actively in professional development and community activities. Thus, while solitude has its challenges, it can also create opportunities for growth and exploration.Yet, perhaps the most important lesson of living alone is realizing the true value of family.
When family members are present, we often become accustomed to their support and contributions. Their efforts become part of our daily routine, and sometimes we fail to recognize their significance. Living alone changes this perspective dramatically.
One begins to appreciate the countless responsibilities managed by a spouse, parents, or other family members. If your wife is a homemaker and mother, be grateful for her contribution. Managing a household, caring for children, organizing daily routines, and supporting family members require dedication, patience, and sacrifice. These contributions may not always receive public recognition, but they form the foundation of a happy and functioning family.
Even today, there are tasks for which I still seek my wife’s guidance. For example, while I can wash clothes manually, operating the washing machine efficiently may require a quick phone call for assistance. Such moments remind us that expertise develops through consistent effort and experience.
Family members do not merely share a house; they share responsibilities, emotions, burdens, and dreams. Their presence adds comfort, stability, and happiness to life.
At the same time, living alone teaches another valuable lesson: every family member should participate in household responsibilities whenever possible. Helping with daily tasks should not be viewed as an obligation but as an opportunity. It creates understanding, mutual respect, and stronger relationships. When individuals participate in household work, they gain a deeper appreciation for the efforts of others.Moreover, such involvement develops practical life skills and self-confidence. It ensures that one can manage independently whenever circumstances require.
(The author is Associate Professor at the Department of Management, President Institution’s Innovation Council, ITM Gwalior and an IIMA (FDP) Alumnus. He is also certified Business Consultant of AIMA. The views, opinions and conclusions expressed in this article are those of the author and aren’t necessarily in accord with the views of “Kashmir Horizon”)
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Dr. Shahid Amin Trali

Dr. Shahid Amin Trali

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The publication of “Kashmir Horizon” as an English daily was started with a modest attempt on May 19, 2008.It has been a Himalayan attempt for “The Kashmir Horizon” to survive the challenges posed to journalism in the violence fraught place like Jammu & Kashmir.

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