Dr. Bilal A. Bhat & Intizar Ahmad
In Islam Friendship and companionship are very important as much of our lives are spent in interaction with others. Humans have always been social creatures and in need of friends and companions. A good friend is one who accepts your shortcomings, but at the same time must guides and supports you. A good friend is one who accommodates your faults but corrects them where possiblefor the sake of Allah.We all know that we were created for a specific purpose and that Allah the Most High has given us life in order to test us. All of us believe that Allah has sent us a Messenger (PBUH) and revealed to us the Qur’an, the Best Speech. In an authentic Hadith, the Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) said: “A person is likely to follow the faith of his friend, so look whom you befriend.” The person most noble in character and dealings with fellow humans gave us a very clear message and advice in regard to friendship. There is no good in the companion who does not wish for us (from good) what he wishes for himself. There is also no good in the companion who wishes for us what he wishes for himself, if what he likes for his own soul is leading him towards destruction and Hellfire. The bases for the actions of those who follow the evil ways are corrupt; their actions are built upon misguidance and deviation. Affection which results from that friendship leads to love and closeness to other than the righteous believers, and this may even lead to avoiding those who are on the Straight Way. Mixing with followers of any way other than that of the Guidance also results in a change in one’s behavior, morals and conduct. Instead of making friends with the misguided ones we should befriend the righteous and treat the rest in a gracious and just manner. Staying at sufficient distance is necessary, yet treating everybody in a noble and kind manner is required. In another Hadith, Prophet Muhammad PBUH) said: “The example of a good companion and a bad companion is like that of the seller of musk, and the one who blows the blacksmith’s bellows.. So as for the seller of musk then either he will grant you some, or you buy some from him, or at least you enjoy a pleasant smell from him. As for the one who blows the blacksmith’s bellows then either he will burn your clothes or you will get an offensive smell from him.”
Allah the Exalted says in the Qur’an: “And (remember) the Day when the wrong-doer will bite his hands and say: Woe to me! Would that I had taken a path with the Messenger. Woe to me! If only I had not taken so- and-so as a friend! He has led me astray from this Reminder (the Qur’an) after it had come to me. And Satan is ever a deserter to man in the hour of need.” Qur’an 25:27-29 So take heed before the inevitable Day comes when we are called to account for our actions. Allah, the All-Wise also says: “Friends on that Day will be enemies one to another, except al-Muttaqoon (i.e. those who have Taqwah).” Qur’an 43:67 Hafidh Ibn Katheer, commenting on this verse, relates a story on the authority of Ali Ibn Abi Talib (ra) and says that any friendship for other than Allah is turned into enmity, except what was in it for Allah the Mighty and Majestic: “Two who are friends for Allah’s sake; one of them dies and is given good news that he will be granted al-Jannah, so he remembered his friend and he supplicated for him, saying: ‘O Allah, my friend used to command me to obey You and to obey Your Prophet PBUH) and used to command me to do good and to forbid me from doing evil. And he told me that I will meet You. O Allah, do not let him go astray after me, until you show him what you have just shown me, until You are satisfied with him, just like You are satisfied with me.’ So he is told: ‘Had you known what is (written) for you friend, would you have laughed a lot and cried a little.’ Then his friend dies and their souls are gathered, and both are asked to express their opinions about each other. So each one of them says to his friend: ‘You were the best brother, the best companion and the best friend.’ And when one of the two disbelieving friends dies, and he is given tidings of Hellfire, he remembered his friend and he said: ‘O Allah, my friend used to order me to disobey You and disobey Your Prophet, and commanded me to do evil, and forbade me from doing good, and told me that I would not meet You. O Allah, do not guide him after me, until you show him what you have just shown me and until you are dissatisfied with him just like You are dissatisfied with me.’ Then the other disbelieving friend dies, and their souls are gathered, and both are asked to give their opinions about each other. So each one says to his friend: ‘You were the worst brother, the worst companion and the worst friend.” Sealing a friendship for Allah’s sake will result in one’s receiving protection of Allah (swt). A scholar has said: “To seal a friendship for Allah’s sake indicates the obligation of establishing relationships of love and trust for His sake; this is a friendship for the sake of Allah. It also indicates that simple affection is not enough here; indeed what is meant is a love based upon alliance. This entails assistance, honor, and respect. It means being with those whom you love both in word and deed.” Loyalty for the sake of Allah really means to love Allah and to come to the assistance of His Deen; to love those who are obedient to Him and to come to their help. Moreover, the Shahadah “La Ilaha Illa Allah” requires us to ally ourselves for the sake of Allah, and it requires us to ally ourselves to the Muslims wherever we find them. The wise person is the one who prepares himself for the Hereafter, not the one who neglects his faith and falls into the trap of Satan who tells him that he will be forgiven and that he can do whatever he wishes. If we truly believe that the best speech is the Speech of Allah and that he best guidance is the guidance of Prophet Muhammad PBUH), we should act in accordance with them, lest we build a proof against ourselves. Hadrat Ali (RA) said: “Mix with the noble people, you become one of them; and keep away from evil people to protect yourself from their evils.” If we are truly concerned about our fate, we must come to this realisation: those who take us away from remembering Allah, from obeying Him and His Prophet (PBUH), those who fail to remind us of our daily prayers and those who do not give us sincere advice in regard to our Deen; such are really our foes and not our friends. On the other side, “a believer is the mirror of his brother”. Ibn Hazm said: “Anyone who criticises you cares about your friendship.
“Choosing a righteous friend is crucial in Islam, as companions influence one’s faith and actions. Befriend those who guide you to Allah’s obedience to achieve paradise and avoid the regrets of bad company on the Day of Judgment.”
Good companionship, choosing and having good companions is extremely important for many reasons and from many aspects. The main one are as under:-
(a) Mankind cannot live alone; every individual must live and interact with others.
(b) Those people who you sit with and make your friends are inevitably going to fall into one of two categories. Either they are going to be good individuals – who guide and encourage you towards what is good and help you to accomplish that which Allah has ordered, or they are going to be bad – encouraging you to do what is pleasing to Shaytaan, that which misleads you, and leads you to the Hell-Fire.
(c) When the Prophet PBUH) was sent with the Da’wah to establish the Deen of al-Islaam, he did not do it on his own. Rather, Allah chose for him companions who accompanied him and who carried the Message until it was complete. These three aspects show the importance of having good companions, companions who are Saalih (righteous). Such a companion will help you to do what is good and remind you of Allah, he will enjoin what is good and forbid what is evil. They also show the importance of avoiding keeping bad companions. Such a companion will have a bad effect upon you, they help you to do those deeds which are displeasing to Allah and which lead to the Hell-Fire – and we seek Allah’s refuge from that.
The holy Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) explained the matter of good companionship, so that no room is left for doubt or confusion, when he said: “A person is upon the Deen of his khaleel – close friend, so look to whom you befriend.” [Abu Dawood and At-Tirmidhee]. The Prophet PBUH) also explained this great principle further in another narration, wherein he stated, “Do not keep company except with a believer, and do not feed except a person who has taqwaa (fear of Allah).” [Abu Dawood and At-Tirmidhee] Moosaa wanted his brother to support him and help him, protect him and accompany him. And this is what the believers do for one another. For the thing that binds the believers together and makes them brothers is Eemaan. The Prophet PBUH) said, “There are three characteristics; whoever has them will taste the sweetness of Eemaan: That Allah and His Messenger are more beloved to him than all else, that he loves a person and does not love him except for Allah, and that he would hates to revert to unbelief just as he would hate to be thrown into the Fire.” [Al-Bukhaaree and Muslim]. Thus the connection between the believers is based upon Eemaan and sincere brotherhood. Be warned against taking any companion if such companionship is based upon other than this, for if you were to do that you would then bite your hands in grief. Just as the unjust ones will bite their hands in grief on the Last Day. Saying, “Oh! Would that I had taken a path with the Messenger. Ah! Woe to me! Would that I had never taken so-and-so as a friend! He indeed led me astray from the Reminder (the Qur’aan) after it had come to me.” [25:27] And Allah says, “And whosoever turns away from the remembrance of the Most Beneficent (Allah), We appoint for him Shaytaan to be a Qareen (intimate companion) to him.” [43:36] So all of the physical togetherness that you see around you, which is based upon other than Eemaan will be wiped away on that Day, and it will be a source of misery and torture for them. Allah says that those who love one another for other than the sake of Allah will be “…foes one to another…” on the Last Day. [43:67] The Prophet PBUH) said, “The case of the good companion and the bad companion is like that of the seller of musk and the blower of the bellows (iron-smith). As for the seller of musk, he will either give you some of the musk, or you will purchase some from him, or at least you will come away having experienced its good smell. Whereas the blower of the bellows will either burn your clothing, or at least you will come away having experienced its repugnant smell” [Al-Bukhaaree and Muslim]. The good companion has been given this similitude because he is righteous and will help you to remember Allah. If he sees you make a mistake he will advise you and support you, whereas the bad companion would forsake you; leaving you at the time when you are most in need of him. “And remember the Day when the Dhaalim (wrong-doer, oppressor) will bite at his hands, he will say, ‘Oh! Would that I had taken a path with the Messenger. Ah! Woe to me! Would that I had never taken so-and-so as a friend! He indeed led me astray from the Reminder (this Qur’aan) after it had come to me.. And Shaytaan is ever a deserter to man in the hour of need’” [25:27-29]. The bad companion is the Shaytaan from amongst mankind, and the Shayaateen are both men and jinns. Sometimes the harm that comes from the Shayaateen amongst men is greater than the harm that comes from the Shayaateen of the jinn. As a matter of fact the Shayaateen amongst mankind could probably teach the Shayaateen from the jinn a few things they didn’t know! “Allah did indeed help him (Muhammad) when the disbelievers drove him out. The second of the two, when they (Muhammad and Abu Bakr) were in the cave, and he PBUH) said to his companion, ‘Be not sad (or afraid), surely Allah is with us’.” [9:40] He PBUH) said, ‘Surely Allah is with us’, not ‘with me’, since Abu Bakr had supported the Prophet in the establishing of the Deen of Allah, he had thus earned the right to be supported by Allah also. Abu Bakr – a good friend and companion, one who was willing to sacrifice everything for the sake of Allah and to the service of His Messenger PBUH); his blood, his wealth, his sweat, his tears and everything that he owned he gave for Allah’s sake. Abu Bakr As-Siddeeq, May Allah be pleased with him and he pleased with Allah, the first Khaleefah after the Prophet (PBUH) and his great companion, the best of this Ummah after the Prophet, sets for us this great example of the good companion who is like the perfume merchant. We ask Almighty Allah to make us of the righteous ones and give us companions that will take us away from His Wrath and lead us to His Pleasure and Paradise. Aameen!
(The authors write regularly on “Islamic Topics” exclusively for the opinion pages of “Kashmir Horizon”. The views, opinions and conclusions expressed in this article are those of the author and aren’t necessarily in accord with the views of “Kashmir Horizon”)
[email protected]
[email protected]
